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Being On Her Good Side Is Not Good
there are no sides
I am going to use my neighbor Betty as my prime example. Though, I know of too many others like her. Many of them, unfortunately, are members of my family. This is the type of person that may seem nice, when they choose to. In neighborhood, friend, social or work groups they are on their best behavior, typically. They wear their nicest mask for those they need to impress. In casual situations you likely would not see anything but the nice presentation. But for select people, the ones they deem unworthy of their effort to conceal it, they are tyrants.
I thought of her as a friend. It was after my husband left that she fully exposed herself. Also, I began to withdraw from people to protect myself. I had no energy to stroke her ego. I had crawled through some hellish trauma and I wasn’t up for tolerating any more shit.
My former friendly self
Once, I said that “I am glad that I am on her good side. Can you imagine if I had not been friends with her?”
The thought at the time was that it is much better to be “in” with her rather than “out”; better to be her “friend” than her “enemy”. I was imagining being outside of her “friend zone” and on the receiving end of her fierceness.
