Hi Pravin: Yes I agree this issue is very complex. I think it would be a very interesting conversation to have. And I think it would be interesting to explore more deeply our backgrounds, beliefs and thoughts to get deeper to the root of this. But for now, we can have a go at a basic dialogue. "is it ok to continue to rely on the anger": Good question. I think "rely" is a key word. Again it depends on the person. One example for me: My family of origin are toxic and abusive. Only now after I have gotten away from an abusive spouse, have I had a massive shift in my life. I now have time and space, for the first time and am processing it all more deeply. I wouldn't say that I rely on anger or even that I am aware that I feel anger. I do think in my case that I should try to process my experience more deeply and in doing so may feel a lot of anger, grief and other emotions. I won't set a time or boundary for what emotions I may feel. And while I may not feel anger now, I may need to revisit it all along the journey. I would say how each of us defines anger and what that looks like would be another interesting discussion. As you say it is complex. "broken free of the abusers hold": Yes that is deep and complex also. I hear what you are saying. I appreciate the opportunity to dialogue more and your thoughtful reply. It is not my intention to oppose your perspective. I come from a legalistic Christian upbringing. My experience is toxic people and trauma. Forgiving and anger are oppressive themes that have been taught and hurt me throughout my life. I recently stepped outside of my religious belief system. It is an amazing perspective from where I am now as opposed to before.