I am sad that he treated you this way. Neglect and withholding are as destructive as other forms abuse. I typically see people like this behaving differently around their "outer circle" of friends and acquaintances.

My ex-spouse neglected and withheld warmth and kindness. I know he noticed because he would take jabs at me for wearing certain things if I "had to" go out. I realize only in hindsight that he was worrying that I would attract attention. It is all so messed up! Am I really going to seduce someone in my large, long sweater just because I have a lace cami on underneath it?? He would give weak compliments occasionally, but they seemed taunting and more like a question, not something that sounded like he believed.

I hope you begin to absorb the beauty and wonder of your inherent worth and value! I am trying to learn to be grounded in who I am as I deconstruct the toxic views that others have had of me.

I really appreciate you connecting and sharing!