"I might help you change that idea": Seeing good relationships will not change my perspective on waiting on God to provide the perfect spouse. If it is true that you have a healthy relationship, I am grateful that this is your experience. And I could appreciate that you seem to use compassion and encouragement and may have positive intention, still it is wrapped in your religious belief.
"Then I dont think ITs a destructive concept....": Maybe you don't think so for you. But it would be wrong to say that it isn't for others.
"that is impossible to break unless a person stops having faith in God": I must disagree that a relationship cannot break unless a person ceases to have faith in God. I know many relationships that break as they still have faith in God.
"For my wife and I to stop having faith is impossible": I know it is not impossible to stop having faith in God.
"I hope I can brighten your idea about relationships being good": Did I say that I have an idea that relationships can't be good? Is it difficult for you to see pain, agony and trauma in our world?
"its in fact something for us all to try and learn and gain more awareness how we can make our relationships GOOD.": Okay, if we are talking about stepping on toes, you have broken both my feet! You don't know me or my experience. Though, you can read my writing on this platform, if you wish. It feels like a burdensome assumption in this that "I could be more AWARE about how I can learn how to make my relationships GOOD". If we are going to be real and encourage each other, I need to say this feels presumptuous, ignorant and arrogant to me on some levels.
"its a recipe.... a bit of this and that... It Is Possible. Trust me .": It may be that you wish to encourage. Instead, you telling me there is a recipe, feels arrogant and talking down to me. It feels like preaching at me without knowing my life experience.
Your relationship does not change my experience. No one gets to erase my lifetime of faith and serving God. No one gets to say that if only I follow certain steps, then I will know the true and beautiful way. You should not tell a person what is possible unless you have walked in their shoes. And you should be very aware that you are giving people prescriptions and suppositions who suffer abuse. You are way off base in your approach. There are multiples of millions of people in our world that will never have a good relationship, or even a good life or a good day. Abuse and trauma is brutal and agonizing and there is no recipe you should offer to the people enduring it. Abuse and trauma is my experience too. I know there are good relationships. I don't know that I will ever experience one in this lifetime. Please consider what you are saying. It is more important to learn to see, hear and understand than to tell... I know that it is difficult when you are inside the walls of religion.
