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Is It Make Up Sex Or Coercion?
after a gut wrenching marriage conference
Years ago, my then husband and I attended a marriage conference. It was Christian, religious based. It is only at this moment that I am digging deeper into the real and underlying motives for even going to this conference. The reason lies in knowing my life and entire relationship with this guy was an illusion created in a twisted mind. His own persona with me was an image he created.
It wasn’t me that wanted to go. I was in all ways spent, exhausted and down for the count. It was the typical cyclical rollercoaster of our relationship. It was the ups and downs. And I was unwilling to be pulled up again for the upside (the possibility of hope). Staying down was stable, real and healthier for me. But he would not have it. It was he who found the conference, threw out the idea and created the script that would convince me to agree to go.
It was a Friday evening and all day Saturday event. It was a nationally created and organized event and was held in a nearby church facility. I remember the coldness of sitting in an auditorium in a business like information intake forum. I remember married speakers sharing about their sexual interactions. His coy way of asking permission of his wife to share each example of their intimate experiences was as if they had not planned it or spoken before at another…
